alala/
beautiful memories/
-------------------------------------------

wow, it's been a while hasn't it?

well here goes nothing...

today i got a phone call from someone
she said that she and her husband was interested in buying a painting
the painting that she wanted to buy was "alala"

alala is my portrait of good and beautiful memories
although, it looks like it's very sexual
i don't relate to it in that way at all

ofcourse i welcome everyone to have their own interpretations of my work
one of my joys as a painter is to hear different reactions
from different people regarding my paintings
but my interpretation of alala is more innocent than anything sexual

maybe the vessel that i used is sexual
but the message it contains is something more romantic

have you ever left your home town to grow up somewhere else, then started missing it? you started building up this beautiful memory of how you felt when you were there. but then finally, after a few years of being away, you come home only to realize that you felt better when you were remebering it than when you are physically in it?

the trees aren't as green.
the streets arent as wide.
the air isn't as fresh.

or.....
have you ever had a lost love?
you remember how beautiful she was. her hair was soft and silky. your conversations flowed like melted honey. you felt so passionate and comfortable around her.
then
you see her again after so long.
you meet her for some coffee and you notice that she's really not that beautiful.
and your conversation was choppy
and
forced

these are about memories that seem to out do real life. they are circumstances saved by your mind that are romanticized by the feelings of your heart.

my memory is of my father...
i hear he wasn't much of a dad

he cheated on my mom
drank too much
enjoyed life too much
and wasn't grown up enough
to give my brother and I
a bright future

but i remember him fondly
i see him much like how someone would see
this man in the painting alala

my memory paints my dad
as someone larger than life
and
more beautiful than reality would allow

my dad was the most perfect father anyone
could ever have
and if he were alive
i wouldn't have the trouble that i have now
in trying to succeed

i remember him that way
and i'm satisfied
with my beautiful memory

......

so i'm talking to this person on the phone
she says that she wants to buy alala
she somehow asks me if i were filipino

i said yes

then she said "wow, you know my dad's filipino"

then i remembered my dad
and how beautiful he was...